Hi there,

My 13-year-old came to me last week asking if he could take an animation course. It was designed for 16-year-olds and required it as the age minimum, kids who are getting ready to freelance, build portfolios, and start careers in animation.

I looked for something his age, and most of them felt too basic. Everything that matched his level of interest was meant for older kids. That's when I realized: kids are getting bored, not because there aren't enough options, but because they’ve mentally outgrown the content designed for their age.

They Know Too Much, Too Soon

Kids today have access to everything. YouTube tutorials, Reddit forums, advanced courses, and professional communities. They're learning things we didn't learn until college, sometimes earlier.

My boys know things I didn't know at their age, and I'm guessing yours do too.

But the problem is, they have the information, but they're still kids. They have the knowledge, but not the emotional regulation. They want to do adult-level work, but they don't have the developmental foundation for it yet.

So they're stuck in this gap between what interests them and what they're actually ready for, and everything in between? Boring.

But just when kids are already mentally ahead of their age group and struggling to find things that interest them, the world starts telling parents: your kid needs to be doing more.

So instead of letting kids sit in that boredom and figure out what actually interests them, parents start adding activities to fill the gap because there's this belief now that if your kid isn't doing 50 things by middle school, they're falling behind.

The Competitive Pressure Makes It Worse

There's this belief now that to get into a good college, kids need to do 50 different things, take the hardest classes, join every club, start a nonprofit, build a portfolio, all before they're 16.

So parents are trying to prepare them for a future that feels impossibly competitive.

My husband is a physician. Parents book appointments for their high school kids to see him as a patient. But when they come in, they don't actually need medical care. They ask if their kid can shadow him. So they can put it on their college application.

This literally happens. That's the level of intensity parents are operating under right now. It's not just one family. It's everywhere.

What I Learned as an Admissions Reader

I used to read college applications for admissions at a top university, and I found that kids with packed resumes didn’t have a much higher chance of getting in than the kids who followed their passion and made an impact in one or two areas.

So let’s stop and consider, if the chances aren't that different, why are we stressing out kids to do everything?

Here's what I'm doing: I'm not forcing age-appropriate content. If he wants to learn animation at a 16-year-old level, I'll let him try. He might struggle. He might realize he's not ready. But that's part of learning.

I'm not adding more activities to fix boredom. I’ve even fallen victim to the instinct of filling the gap with something "useful." But sometimes the gap is where the growth happens.

I'm letting him explore what interests him, even if it's not "useful." My older son does acting. People ask, "But what else is he doing?" As if one thing isn't enough. But one deep passion is worth more than 10 scattered activities.

I'm reminding myself, it's going to be fine.

Many of us shut down exploration before the kid has a chance to figure out what they actually care about.

But when you let kids explore, even if it seems pointless, they find things that stick. A kid who loves video games might get into coding. A kid who loves YouTube might get into film editing. One thing builds on another.

But only if you let them explore it.

Note for My Fellow Laid-Back Parents

Your kid is bored and you're wondering if you should do something about it. But here's what I want you to know: if your kid is bored, it’s ok. It might mean they've outgrown the things designed for their age. It might mean they're overstimulated and nothing feels interesting anymore.

Boredom is where curiosity starts. When people ask, “What are your kids doing?" you can smile and say, "They're being 13." That's enough for now. 

See you next week,
Lakshmi 💛