Hi there,

Last week, my son came up to me and said he needed a $300 camera.

Not wanted. Needed. Because “everyone has it.”

We’re raising kids in a world where influence isn’t just on billboards or TV, it's in their hands, on their screens, 24/7. They’re growing up being sold to. Constantly. This is where de-influencing comes in.

Hi I am Lakshmi, mom of 2 boys, and no i’m not anti-everything. But I'm a huge fan of asking: Do we really need this? Every once in a while. 

This issue is a deep dive into what that looks like in a real home, with real kids, and a whole lot of Pop-Its.

So... What is de-influencing?

To me, de-influencing is: Not getting sucked into buying something just because someone online said it’s great.

It sounds simple, but we all know it’s harder than it looks, especially when you’re a tired parent and the influencer seems so relatable. 

Lately, I’ve seen more people online doing the opposite: urging others not to buy, pushing for slower, more mindful choices. That’s what de-influencing really is—a quiet movement asking us to pause before we spend. 

I’ve had moments where my kids, especially my older one who watches a lot of YouTube Shorts, will come to me asking for something totally random. And I’ll say, “What is that? And why do you want it?”

Almost always, it’s because they saw someone online use it. That’s where the real work starts.

De-influence yourself in the next 19 mins!  

The DJI Camera Moment

My son once got really fixated on this high-end DJI Pocket Camera. It’s an adult-level camera, but he came to me and said, “Everyone has it. It’s the camera to use.”

He’s into filmmaking, sure, but this was over the top. I remember thinking, Where did this come from?

I had to draw the line. I told him,
“Use my old camera. Let’s not go down the influencer rabbit hole.”

Talking NEEDS V WANTS with your tweens! .

Remember Pop-Its? We Have 12.

A few years ago, there was a pop-it craze at school. You probably saw them: little silicone fidgets you can press. Every kid had one.

We now have about 12 sitting in drawers.

It’s harmless, sure, but it’s the pattern that matters. They see it online. They want it immediately. We buy it. They forget about it in a week. 

The 30-Day Rule

When my kids really want something, I’ve started applying this small but powerful rule: Wait 30 days.

If it’s something smaller, maybe just a week. But the point is to let the initial high fade. Learn all about the 30 day rule here! 

If they still want it after a month, then we sit down and talk:

✔️ Why do you want this?
✔️ What’s it actually going to change in your life?
✔️ Who’s paying for it?

This helps build awareness instead of guilt or frustration, for both kids and us.

One Thing I Refused to Buy… 

The Stanley Cup. 

When my son was in 4th or 5th grade, everyone had one. It was the thing. Now they’re even banned in some schools, they leak, take up too much space, and let’s be honest... they’re not all that practical.

Now it’s the Owala Cup. My son likes it because it’s less girly. Ironically, I bought one before it even became popular. Found it at a local store because I needed a water bottle. Weeks later, it was everywhere. 

Sometimes you get ahead of the trend by accident. Haha!

So, What’s the Balance?

Of course, we want to say yes to our kids every once in a while.

Saying no to everything can build resentment, and sometimes influencers do recommend genuinely helpful things. 

But we try to ask ourselves:

• Does this add value?

• Will it keep them curious, creative, or calm?

• Is there a learning moment in this?

And if yes, we still make them earn it. That means using their allowance, saving up, or helping around the house.

Because otherwise, it all starts to feel like free money. 

That’s all for today’s issue, parents! 💗

Inside the Laid-back Parent’s Internet History this week: 

Note for My Fellow Laid-Back Parents 📧 

We’re not trying to build minimalist households or raise kids who never ask for anything.
We just want them to pause, think, and choose better, and to model the same for ourselves.

De-influencing isn’t about saying no to everything.
It’s about slowing down long enough to ask, “Do we really need this?”

And sometimes, that question alone is enough.

Until next time,
Lakshmi 💛